That said, I suppose it would be foolish of me to expect the teenage douchebaggery machine to sit idle in times of innovation. Much like a booster following his alma mater, I still enjoy a good prank and occasionally watching a well thought out foray into juvenile delinquency.

However, this is just bush league.

I’m a dick. There, I said it.

Now that I’ve brought you up to speed we are free to get to this first of what I hope to be a few of my these videos.

The Backstory

I recently got married and my favorite uncle, often known for impressive, thoughtful and occasionally expensive gifts, went way outside the box.

What did he get us to help commemorate and celebrate the biggest day of our lives? A pair of ceramic chihuahua salt and pepper shakers. Well played, sir. Well played, indeed.

We all know that no ill will was implied by such a gift. Moreover, we have our doubts that he even knew what was in the box. However, that doesn’t mean we are going to let it go.

Hitler Learns Of The Chihuahuas

Here is a direct link to the video on YouTube. It is also embedded in the post below.

The chihuahuas recently spent a week in Croatia with us, filming on location and experiencing a cross section of eastern Europe.

Let’s find out what happens when Hitler learns of my uncle and his amazing chihuahuas:

Really, Palm? Really?

I’m not sure if you were going for Borg, Minority Report Precog or a combination of both, but someone should have stepped in and stopped that train wreck before it aired nationally every 60 seconds.

To put it in perspective, if the smartphone world was a boy band you would be Chris Kirkpatrick. Who’s that, you ask? Exactly.

The numbers sum it up best. In 2000, your stock traded at up to $669 a share while today it trades for just over $11, prompting Time to call you one of the 10 biggest tech failures of the last decade. Quite the achievement.

Furthermore, you went on to hack iTunes and then cried about it to the USB board when Apple closed the loophole. So I can’t say anyone has a great deal of sympathy for you.

That said, your commercials are painful and the otherworldly vibe isn’t very inviting. Moreover, what the hell is she talking about? I guess wherever she comes from a synced calendar and side-scrolling address book equate to a religious experience.

Watch Agatha the Precog get all deep and stuff:

Yeah, yeah, the schnozberries taste like schnozberries, we get it. If that shook you to your core and made you question life and reality as you know it, then I’m willing to bet that the Hannah Montana movie resides somewhere near the top of your list of life changing events.

I can only hope that Palm will run out of money for ad campaigns soon. I’ve got a feeling they will.

IMPORTANT NOTE: For greater appreciation and a good laugh, check out San Francisco Weekly’s 6 Saddest iPhone Cakes first.

I recently got married and my amazing wife had a fantastic iPhone groom’s cake made for me. There’s no doubt about it– it was definitely a huge hit!

Also, I learned that clever cakes, photo booths and crab cakes are all major crowd favorites. Plan accordingly.

Not knowing what to expect, I had a feeling that my groom’s cake would be Xbox related, but I was super surprised to find the best iPhone cake I’ve ever seen.

[Show as slideshow]

The cake was created by Puff ‘N Stuff in Orlando, Florida and was amaretto flavored with a vanilla cream icing.